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According to my itemized cost analysis and fiduciary forecast, if expenditures continue to outpace earnings, insolvency is a foregone conclusion. My advice is, sell the cats.
Explain to me again why enjoying life when I retire is more important than enjoying life now.
You found a dime on the sidewalk and didn't invest it. Does this mean you've changed your mind about retiring someday?
The bad news is, the market threw a wrench into your retirement plans. The good news is, you can probably sell the wrench for $10 on eBay!
If you had taken tomorrow's advice yesterday, you'd be rich today!
Only a total idiot would recommend blue chips. Everybody knows yellow chips taste better with salsa!
Bonds are a great investment. I sold a vintage 007 doll on eBay for $900!
The stock market fell sharply today, then bounced back, spiraled upward, jumped forward, leaped to new heights, tumbled rapidly and took first place in a gymnastics competition.
I reviewed your investments and set you up for early retirement. On your last day of work, you can afford to leave at 4:30 instead of 5:00.
toon-2047
The bank turned down our loan, but approved the payments.
In economic news, the dollar was down today against the Euro, Franc, Shekel, round salt wheel, Rai stone, multicolored trading beads and chocolate coins.
Neat Document-Randy Glasbergen, P.O. Box 797, Sherburne, N.Y. 13460. Phone: 607-316-4707. E-MAIL: randy@glasbergen.com Technology
Your grandmother sent you $5 for your birthday. Put it in the bank for a very long time and someday it will be worth $2.
The bank found suspicious activity on my credit card. It was being used responsibly to buy necessary things.
Any other collateral besides your heart of gold and million-dollar smile?
Math Cartoons: math teachers, math classes, math students, math homework, math problems, math numbers, math studies, teaching math.
Just because I
The bad news is, the market threw a wrench into your retirement plans. The good news is, you can probably sell the wrench for $10 on eBay!
Your grandmother sent you $5 for your birthday. Put it in the bank for a very long time and someday it will be worth $2.
I work 80 hours a week and you work 90 hours a week --- but we earn too much to be classified as a

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