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For a healthier economy, I recommend a fitness program of high-intensity interval spending.
I\'m convinced that all corporations are evil, but Bruce Wayne says free market capitalism is the only thing that can save the world.
Here\'s our new retirement plan –– At age 65, we\'ll get divorced then marry other people who planned better.
The Buck Stops Here for a brief rest then continues on its journey to the IRS.
I retire on Friday and I haven\'t saved a dime. Here\'s your chance to become a legend!
You\'re well prepared for your retirement years. Now let\'s talk about any expenses you may incur in your eternal afterlife.
Use your savings to build a time machine. You can afford to retire in 1950.
Where is this retirement income stream I keep hearing about?
Stocks plummeted today to a near-record low because that\'s what stocks do sometimes.
My idea of planning for the future is programming the DVR.
When you\'re done saving for my educatin, don\'t forget to start saving for my retirement.
On your last day of work, you get to keep all the returnable cans and bottles in the break room. That\'s our pension plan.
My short-term financial goal is to survive until Tuesday. My long-term goal is to survive until Friday.
Don\'t worry about the future. I swapped your retirement fund for 5 cords of firewood, some vegetable seeds and a brooding hen.
I\'m not very smart about investing. When they talk about a \'dip\' in the market, I think they mean me.
I have 1000 TV remote batteries, 2500 bags of potato chips and 3000 bottles of beer saved for my retirement. Do I need anything else?
This toy company looks like a good investment. Their board of directors includes Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, Mother Goose and the Great Pumpkin.
I was hit by a financial tidal wave and now I\'m drowning in debt. Is it too late to get flood insurance?
I\'m sluggish, you\'re sluggish, everyone we know is sluggish. Why shouldn\'t the economy be sluggish too?
Why can\'t I deposit leftovers into my IRA? I\'ll need to eat something when I retire!
If dolphins are just as smart as humans, why aren\'t we investing in underwater shopping malls and teaching them how to use credit cards?

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