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Pharmacist

I've been taking this medication for 45 years and the side effects turned me into an old man!
Your media levels are low. I'm prescribing faster Internet, upgraded cable, satellite radio, and a smartphone with YouTube, Pandora, Facebook, Hulu and Netflix.
toon_93

pharm17
Right now I take a blue pill, a purple pill, an orange pill, a white pill and a yellow pill. I need you to prescribe a green pill to complete my collection.
Can you prescribed marijuana to help relieve the boredom of sitting in your waiting room?

Neat Document-Randy Glasbergen, P.O. Box 797, Sherbume, N.Y. 13460. Phone: 607-316-4707. E-MAIL: randy@glasbergen.com Sports
Are you sick and tired of prescription drug advertising on TV? Ask your doctor about Advexx to relieve that sick and tired feeling!
Side effects may include hairy lungs, heart giggles, plaid eyeballs, euphoric knees, navel coughing, nostalgia about the future and loss of desire to yodel.

Your prescription is $30, but there's a $75 co-pay.
Healthy food is expensive. Can you write me a prescription for groceries?
I need something to relieve my stress. Can you prescribe some money?

I'm writing you a prescription: Be happy and feel great 3 times a day.
While you were napping at your desk, we drained all of your blood and replaced it with coffee.
When you're retired, you'll have plenty of time to do more reading...mostly prescription labels.

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This Week’s Cartoons

If at first you don't succeed, eat something then take a nap. Muffin Jackson set a new world's record today, jumping from the floor to the table to the counter to the top of the refrigerator in just 7.3 seconds. Congratulations, Muffin! I'm looking for a compression program that will help me fit a Rottweiler into a Federal Express envelope. First I whimper, then I show them my big, brown, sad eyes. It works every time. My presentation lacks power and has no point. I assumed the software would take care of that! I've got 8 hours invested in this bad mood and I'm not giving up that easily! I have a big pile of mice and birds saved under the porch. I need to rool them over into an IRA.

© Randy Glasbergen. All of the cartoons featured on this site are copyrighted material. Any unauthorized usage is prohibited and illegal. | (2000)