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Healthcare Cartoons

I'm sorry, the computer made an error. You're not influential, you have influenza.
Your health insurance doesn't pay for heartburn. You need fire insurance for that.
You're right, $500 for an aspirin is outrageous. It's supposed to be $5,000!

Right now I take a blue pill, a purple pill, an orange pill, a white pill and a yellow pill. I need you to prescribe a green pill to complete my collection.
Which celebrities should I follow to get the best medical advice?
We've updated our healthcare plan. If you get sick, we'll send you a Get Well card. If the card doesn't make you feel better, you can sue the card company to pay for your hospital bills.

The doctor will be in shortly to type on the computer and update your chart. If he has time, he will ask how you're feeling and take a look at your rash.
Your doctor ordered some tests. If you pass, you get to go home. If you fail, you'll have to repeat 9th grade.
Please don't pray for healing. If it works, your insurance won't know who to reimburse and it messes up our accounting system.

I would be a lot healthier if you'd stop finding things wrong with me!
I already diagnosed myself on the Internet. I'm only here for a second opinion.
If you are not 100% satisfied with your surgery, the defective organ will be cheerfully refunded.

I'd like you to eat more fruit and vegetables, but they're not covered by your health insurance plan.
All the king's horses and all the king's men helped Humpty sign up for Obamacare.
Laughter is the best medicine, but there's a $50 co-pay.

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This Week’s Cartoons

How much would it cost to add God to our board of directors? Your pacemaker has plastic parts that can melt, so don't watch any heart-warming movies. Until we figure out why our computer is paying you sixty million dollars a week, I'll expect you to put in some overtime to justify the expenditure. Mr. Milton Bludklott, a very dedicated Biology teacher, has been dissected 237 times. Let's make a deal - If you don't join the cigar trend, I won't join the thong bikini trend! I hate to spoil your vacation, but it's time to start wearing the kind of trunks your dad wore. When the doctor told you to eat more fish, what he meant was eat fish more often.

© Randy Glasbergen. All of the cartoons featured on this site are copyrighted material. Any unauthorized usage is prohibited and illegal. | (2000)