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Misc. Medical Cartoons

I got a speeding ticket on my way to work. I was driving under the influence of bran.
Yellowing of the skin is a side effect of your antidepressant medication.
That is a suspicious looking mole. It sort of resembles Richard Nixon.
I'm not licensed to prescribe marijuana. Smoke two aspirin and call me in the morning.
Cholesterol is good for you. It blocks your arteries, making it more difficult for germs and viruses to reach your vital organs.
I have a migraine so I called you in for one of your mind-numbing conversations.
For lunch I had a bottle of root beer, a bag of potato chips and two candy bars. Giving up red meat is easier than I thought!
The tests show you\'re not losing your memory. Are you doing anything worth remembering?
I\'m prescribing some yellow pills because you\'ve reached your insurance limit for blue, green, orange, white and pink pills.
This medication can actually improve your memory. Each capsule contains a tiny hard drive.
When the experts determine that high blood pressure, heart disease and diabetes are actually good for you, you\'re going to feel awfully foolish!
We\'ve done everything we can do, Mr. Johnson. Unfortunately, there is no cure for bad insurance.
Before we send you home with your new baby, would like to have him circumcised, pierced and tattooed?
I stole the identity of a 59 year old man and now I'm waking up three times a nigh to pee.
The high-carb diet I put you on 20 years ago gave you diabetes, high blood pressure and heart disease. Oops.
We found a bunch of these clogging your arteries. They're cholesterol pills.
I try to eat healthy. I never sprinkle salt on ice cream, I only eat decaffeinated pizza and my beer is 100% fat free.
I bought this to help you with your diet. It's a compass that always points to lettuce!
I\'m recommending quadruple bypass surgery. Your insurance company is recommending you take an aspirin every day with your cheeseburgers and pizza.
toon-1720
After I lose 25 pounds, I\'m rewarding myself with a new apartment. When the weight comes back, it won\'t know where to find me.

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