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The Mind Blowing Italian Feast Platter comes with your choice of guilt, regret or defiance.
Heads, I eat what I like and hate myself. Tails, I eat what I hate and like myself.
The good news, it's OK to eat butter after all. The bad news, it's not OK to eat any of the things you like to put butter on.
The handle on your recliner does not qualify as an exercise machine.
Heads, fat is bad and carbs are good. Tails, fat is good and carbs are bad.
A recent study reveals that the human race is simply evolving into a larger species. Feel free to eat anything you want.
If you're looking for something healthy, the menu is gluten free and printed with soy ink.
When the experts determine that high blood pressure, heart disease and diabetes are actually good for you, you're going to feel awfully foolish!
I try to eat healthy. I never sprinkle salt on ice cream, I only eat decaffeinated pizza and my beer is 100% fat free.
I'll have some heart disease, high blood pressure and diabetes with a side of clogged arteries and tooth decay.
Every morning I think about going for a long walk. At least my brain is getting some exercise!
I joined an Internet weight loss group. My computer lost 2 pounds.
When you got caught in the tornado, it twirled your blood sugar into cotton candy.
high blood pressure, high cholesterol, high blood sugar, high anxiety...getting high is no fun at my age!
I'm recommending weight loss surgery. After you remove a couple of potato chips, sew the bag shut.
I lost 5 pounds this week, but if you converti it to metric, then factor in dog years and the wind chill factor, it's more like 15 pounds.
I have metal fillings in my teeth. My refrigerator magnets keep pulling me into the kitchen. That's why I can't lose weight!
The sauce has tomatoes and onions. The crust is basically a big crouton. Tehnically, pizza is a salad.
I don't approve of low-carb, high-carb, fat-free, organic, macrobiotic, vegetarian or vegan. Frankly, I don't approve of food.
Each serving contains 10 grams of 'OK in moderation', 5 grams of 'Not the worst thing you could eat' and 15 grams of 'It probably won't kill you'.
Which is more evil...Darth Vader, The Joker, Frankenstein, sugar, fat or carbs?

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