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Medical Technology

I recommend hip replacement surgery for older men who aren\'t as hip as they used to be.
I already diagnosed myself on the Internet. I either have three left kidneys, recurring puberty or Dutch Elm disease.
The doctor will be in shortly to type on the computer and update your chart. If he has time, he will ask how you\'re feeling and take a look at your rash.

Good news –– they just developed an artificial heart that runs on cholesterol.
I'm sorry, the computer made an error. You're not influential, you have influenza.
Who picked \'I\'ve Got You Under My Skin\' to be our on-hold music?

I already diagnosed myself on the Internet. I\'m only here for a second opinion.
Our hospital has the very best technology. I'll be using GPS to locate your appendix.
The first human was cloned in 2002. When he found out, he was beside himself.

Can we buy a 3D printer so you and Mom can make a baby?
We can get a discount on our health insurance if we list Google as our primary care physician.
The blood test shows that your media levels are low. Are you watching enough television?

You have a song in your heart. With today\'s digital technology, you can actually fit 10,000 songs in your heart.
They regrew your hair with stem cells?
Your X-ray showed a broken rib, but we fixed it with Photoshop.

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This Week’s Cartoons

Let's compromise. You do everything I say and I'll say everything you do. Let's compromise. You do everything I say and I'll say everything you do. Let's compromise. You do everything I say and I'll say everything you do. I love you so much, it hurts. That's a nice way of saying, you're giving me a headache. Crashing is an expression of hostility against your network administrator. Though you appear to be uncooperative, it's actually a desperate cry for help. My office has initiated a zero-telerance weapons policy. I was fired for having a sharp mind. codo31-1

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