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Low Carb Diets

No, I can't tell you the meaning of life. I only came up here to avoid the carbs!
codo23
A low-carb diet is bad for you. One of my patients slipped on some bacon grease and broke her leg!

There's a thin person inside me screaming to get out. No, wait –– he's yelling for me to order a pizza!
The Mind Blowing Italian Feast Platter comes with your choice of guilt, regret or defiance.
Inside me, there's a skinny person screaming to get out. No wait, she's yelling at me to order a pizza!

The good news, it's OK to eat butter after all. The bad news, it's not OK to eat any of the things you like to put butter on.
Heads, fat is bad and carbs are good. Tails, fat is good and carbs are bad.
Too bad it was a typo. I was doing pretty well on the low-crab diet!

One diet doctor told me to eat more fruit, nuts and grains. Another told me to eat more meat, fish and cheese. Long story short, I gained 40 pounds!
The high-carb diet I put you on 20 years ago gave you diabetes, high blood pressure and heart disease. Oops.
On this diet, you can eat all the steak you want, but a slice of bread will kill you. On this other diet, you can eat all the bread you want, but a steak will kill you.

A chocolate brownie looks sort of like a giant crouton, so it's almost a salad!
A hot fudge sundae counts as a salad if you replace the cherry with a crouton.
I don't approve of low-carb, high-carb, fat-free, organic, macrobiotic, vegetarian or vegan. Frankly, I don't approve of food.

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This Week’s Cartoons

The Politician's Lunch is a pork sandwich and we send the bill to your grandchildren. The government is providing free college education for everyone. It will be paid for by a new beer and pizza tax. Everywhere I go, people are eager to shake my hand and shower me with compliments. With that kind of charisma, I'd be crazy not to run for office! The government sent us a check. We've failed so many diets, our kitchen qualifies as a disaster area! toon_13 Facebook friends are better than real friends. Nobody on Facebook has bad breath! Is there a GPS app that can help my husband find a faster route to the dishwasher and vacuum cleaner?

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