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Management Cartoons

toon-1903
Great leaders are not born, they are made. Which explains why so many have a screw loose.
I'm sorry, I wasn't listening. Can you repeat everything you've said to me since you started working here?

My boss takes credit for every good thing I do. Rumor has it, he's going to be a mother soon.
If I give you a raise, you'll spend more money. If you spend more money, it will strengthen the economy. If the economy gets stronger, I can hire more people. If I hire more people, one of them might turn out to be an idiot who bankrupts my company. That's why I can't give you a raise!
How to increase productivity spend more time at your work space and less time at productivity seminars get back to work!

I took 15 minutes to stop and smell the roses. When I came back, my wife was gone, my kids were in jail, my business was bankrupt and all of my plants were dead.
Your office has a critical morale problem. My advice is to go from desk to desk licking people's faces.
I'd like to apologize for asking you to step outside of your comfort zone.

If the Queen Bee concept catches on, I will consider you for a full-time leadership position.
Neat Document-Randy Glasbergen, P.O. Box 797, Sherbume, N.Y. 13460. Phone: 607-316-4707. E-MAIL: randy@glasbergen.com Entertainment
We don't pay extra for overtime. If you work more than 8 hours a day, we figure you owe us a volume discount.

I reward my staff with doughnuts because tossing them a fish would be too obvious.
You were my imaginary friend and we had some great times. But I haven't heard from you since I was five years old and now you show up and expect me to give you a job?
There is always room for improvement. It's a small room with no windows or distractions. We already moved your things.

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This Week’s Cartoons

I'm giving you #10 a week allowance. After I deduct part for taxes, your college, your children's college and your retirement, you get to keep 25 cents. Teamwork is vital to the company, Steve. But the rest of us don't think shirts vs. skins is a good idea. We have to stay ahead of our competition. If they lose six million dollars next quarter, then we have to lose seven million! Thank you for calling the Motivation Hotline. If you need a pat on the back, press 1. On Wall Street today, the Dow and Nasdaq did their little dance and everyone pretended that it was very important. My hobbies are drag racing, world-tour golf, extreme football, flying jets, and kickboxing. On my computer, of course. Can't we just talk without you dissecting every word?

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