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High School / College

Neat Document-Randy Glasbergen, P.O. Box 797, Sherburne. N.Y. 13460. Phone: 607-316-4707. E-MAIL: randy@glasbergen.com Entertainment
Neat Document-Randy Glasbergen, P.O. Box 797, Sherbume, N.Y. 13460. Phone: 607-316-4707. E-MAIL: randy@glasbergen.com Entertainment
You're wasting my time with useless knowledge when I should be at work earning money for college!
We're eliminating algebra, trigonometry, geometry and calculus to focus on a four-year program of student loan math.
The world's greatest hoax was exposed today when it was revealed that algebra will never be useful to you later in life.
I've already forgotten most of the stuff I learned in college. Can I just pay for the parts I still remember?
You still owe $12,000 in student loans from a past life.
I found the college I want to attend. They offer a four-year degree program on how to live at home with your parents.
I wear the headphones 24 hours a day. I'm paying a lot for my education and I don't want any of it to leak out!
Many children live at home after college. But it's ok to live at home before college, too.
I'll probably spend my whole life following orders from somebody. Instead of college, maybe you should send me to Obedience School.
The college of my choice is very expensive, but when you graduate, they give you a home in the suburbs, a minivan, a lovely wife, two beautiful children and a golden retriever.
My diploma has an expiration date. Apparently, I'm going to forget everything I learned by May, 2019.
I feel weird about attending my class reunion. There are 40 pounds of me that never went to that school!
My class reunion is next week and I need to lose 25 pounds. Hold the pepperoni.
I'll probably stay in school until I get my PhD. Someday I'd like to feel smarter than my phone.
Plan B: You get a job and we send your smartphone to college.
We'll pay for your college, but only if you go to law school and handle our bankruptcy when you graduate.
Remember, graduates –– if you are not completely satisfied with your education, your ignorance will be cheerfully refunded.
I'm enrolling in seminary college so I can learn about miracles, like how ot pay off my student loans.
It's my resumé. The spell-checker accidentally changed Midstate Junior College to Harvard.

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