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Cardiology

If we quit smoking, our risk of heart attack will go down 30 percent. But if we quit 5 times, our risk will go down 150 percent!
Olive oil is good for your new heart, so is fish oil. And you can still enjoy an occasional motor oil Martini.
It's easy to tell the difference between good cholesterol and bad cholesterol. Bad cholesterol has an evil laugh.

I got a speeding ticket on my way to work. I was driving under the influence of bran.
Cholesterol is good for you. It blocks your arteries, making it more difficult for germs and viruses to reach your vital organs.
For lunch I had a bottle of root beer, a bag of potato chips and two candy bars. Giving up red meat is easier than I thought!

When the experts determine that high blood pressure, heart disease and diabetes are actually good for you, you're going to feel awfully foolish!
I ran a distance of 15 blocks today. They were Lego blocks, but it's a start!
The high-carb diet I put you on 20 years ago gave you diabetes, high blood pressure and heart disease. Oops.

We found a bunch of these clogging your arteries. They're cholesterol pills.
I'm recommending quadruple bypass surgery. Your insurance company is recommending you take an aspirin every day with your cheeseburgers and pizza.
After gobbling everything in sight for 30 years, Pac-Man has been diagnosed with diabetes, high blood pressure and heart disease.

A vegetarian diet is good for your heart. I've never had a rabbit come to me with chest pains.
Keep Christmas in your heart all year long. It will leave less room for cholesterol.
You have a song in your heart. With today's digital technology, you can actually fit 10,000 songs in your heart.

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This Week’s Cartoons

I have a big smile on my facem but you can't see it because it's hidden behind a really bad day. Aside from the people, the hours, the work, the pay, the stress and the migraines, this is the best job I ever had. In my office we celebrate innovation, we celebrate individuality, we celebrate excellence, and we celebrate idealism. Any excuse to party! Take one pill as needed for stress. Throw it over your cubicle and bounce it off the head of an annoying coworker. Cholesterol is a good thing. It helps your arteries from collapsing when you've got the weight of the world coming down on you! They found out what's wrong with my computer.The spell-checker is suffering from exhaustion." Technology Care for some freshly-ground antidepressants in your coffee?

© Randy Glasbergen. All of the cartoons featured on this site are copyrighted material. Any unauthorized usage is prohibited and illegal. | (2000)